Becoming something…

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Finding a balance between your own reality and what is actual reality is probably the hardest thing that we face. We spend the entirety of time with ourselves. A world centered on individual thoughts, reactions, and feelings (to simplify). This universe is under our control more than we think. The problem is that by time we realize it we have developed far into the desert without having traced our steps. It wouldn’t matter anyways, the landscape behind us is vacant of appropriate footprints. Their creation was entirely based on an out of control perception of reality. So what now?

We must continue to trod forward. I think I can relate to anyone on the efforts to try and stop the process, even share techniques. In the end, it’s just making oneself blind to the constant motion. Turning back on and inside out can feel infantile. What I mean is regressing back in thought and feeling back to a time before your own universe stumbled into the desert sand. Religions and other pursuits often focus on this goal, with varying perspectives. The goal might be more about recognizing the necessity of the journey.

Our society is filled more and more with niche interests and exploits and the opportunity to explore them. It is a standing question of how much its fetish or interest vs. psychological dependency. Do we continue to box off and specialize in social sects that reinforce theses tendencies or try our hardest to recognize the vast diversity that should be our experiences?

What results of this journey you ask? A ton of conflict. Two realities clashing can be catastrophic. Especially since knowledge and experience of true reality is scarce and barely recognizable to the inexperienced mind. So as I walk backwards tripping over everything, I encourage you to do the same. Recognizing your power to do so almost forces action. Truth is found in the experiences and challenges that stick with you as you are blindsided by your past and misconceptions of the world around you. We have published ourselves and continue to add chapters without an editors eye.

Begin un-publishing your heart, leaving chapters in the sand. Pick up only what still lies in your path as you journey back all over again. Avoid the temptation to set your compass early and purposely towards repeating or avoiding a chapter. Lather. Rinse. Repeat as necessary.

Edit: [Links to some related posts elsewhere: Fred Phelps at EMU | Fred Phelps To Protest At Eastern Michigan University | Be on the look-out for a hate group disguised as a church on campus today | Fred Phelps To Protest At Eastern Michigan University]

Gathering at the Eastern Michigan University (EMU) Student Center, supportive members of EMU’s campus and surrounding community showed their support for the LGBT community concerning issues of “inclusion and diversity,” stated Dan Burns, Chair of the LGBTRC Advisory Committee. The group, numbering over fifty, was in response to a charge to protest (see press release) by Westboro Baptist Church. They are commonly associated with Fred Phelps, their minister, and GodHatesFags.com. Per the press release, Westboro Baptist Church was choosing EMU as a way to voice their opinion against Campus Crusade for Christ’s, a national organization, decision in some areas to semi-support (Golden Rule Pledge) Day of Silence, a national movement to speak out through silence. EMU has a student organization representing Campus Crusade for Christ, but is not known to have participated in the pledge.

Their picketers did not show, to our knowledge. I was happy to participate. It was again a showing of support on campus (not to mention the $2500 raised for the EMU LGBT Emergency Fund through a $2 donation per Westboro Baptist Church protest minute, matched by Coors).

It reminds me of people’s varying opinions. In a lot of ways, it is daunting. Speaking of the silence we can feel as members of the LGBT… community, this is another example of a voice that keeps me from acting completely freely on a daily basis. In high school, my car was keyed with the word “FAG.” This served as a intense platform of empowerment but in reality did more damage than good. These voices are due for silencing not through limiting free speech but through supportive voices being louder. I encourage you to be the loudest in support as examples to your friends and communities. Examples of love and care need to be louder than those of hate.

Here we are again, the re-run. Jesus up on the cross and Easter plays out again. I am Catholic, but this day is of mixed meaning. Recent revelations have me feeling like the most religious in my family. This is odd. I spent my middle school years collapsing under the pressure of my false understandings of my religion, rejecting it soon thereafter. Much of this pressure coming from the understandings and faith taught to me by my parents.

Today, my partner and I sat and watched a History Channel account of Jesus and his life. He wanted to do something “Jesusy.” This was followed by a viewing of the first Austin Powers movie, International Man of Mystery. A traditional Easter celebration.

Turns out Jesus had a fro and the 90’s brought an end to shagging freely. Seemingly eyeballed by my ancient feeling religiosity and present idealism of sexual freedom, I’ve spent too long crucified by my own belief in others ability to support me. Esteem through sexuality, err sex, and guidance. False guidance that has me feeling much about my sexual history in way that I used to criticize the faithful.

As I watch this re-run and it’s earlier than expected this year, the story is repeated and unchanged, for a reason. The collision of religion that had become overly institutionalized full of wrongdoings with its people. The equality of both, brings the collapse of both.

Refreshed in belief, I am infant. Restrained in sexual self-exploitation, I am immature.

With all my faults in deconstruction, I now understand the power of something greater. The power of something to support me and finding the power to be that something.

Does our society make it hard to feel humbled? Can we feel humbled to something other than money and power? How?

From the same show:

Aimee Mann/Grant-Lee Phillips- You’re A Mean One, Mr. Grinch
Aimee Mann/Paul F. Tompkins-Baby, It’s Cold Outside

It was a birthday gift and I loved it. If you enjoy a mellow almost “non-Christmas” type of celebration, then this is for you. You missed the Ann Arbor, MI performance, but her others can be found here. The classic lyrics and volume of Aimee Mann have brought songs such as “One,” where it can indeed be the loneliest number. Not a song she sang at the show but the majority of the songs, were not of the Christmas type. They were about the humble tone that Christmas, and the holidays, can often bring. High on quirky guest performances and a not quite polished variety show, Aimee Mann and friends shine. I laughed hard, loved the culties, newbies, and felt satisfied realizing that you can be and feel big even in a time when tradition can bring upon so much change.

So, get ready for the new year. Things are going to be crazy all over again.

Good luck shopping!

What is different this year come the holidays? (see: The weather outside is frightful…)

News and articles worth a good read:

Environment:
The Power of Green - Video
Will Bicycling to Work Get You Killed?
High Energy Thursday: Is hydrogen already passé?
Ethanol Boom Benefits Farmers but Raises Environmental Concerns
Seattle’s Recycling Success Is Being Measured in Scraps

Technology:
Apple to Open iPhone Programming to Outsiders
What’s the future of iTunes?

Cultural:
Will customers pay more to do good?
Why is it against the law to make moonshine?
Good times for liberals
Op-Ed Contributor: A Nation of Christians Is Not a Christian Nation

Health:
Staph Bigger Killer Than AIDS
Is birth control lowering the abortion rate?

Gay:
National Review and Gays

China:
Op-Ed Contributor: How China Got Religion
Gays Advance In China

Global News:
The War In Africa
Understanding Global Poverty

National News:
Breaking Point in Immigration Debate
Let’s abolish the Electoral College

Interesting:
The trouble with indie rock.
Did Al Gore deserve a Nobel Peace Prize for his work on global warming?
Fucking and the English Language
Naked Swarming Abercrombie

You, Us, and Now:
The Real Deal about Gen Y: They’re Inherently Conservative
Proud atheists
Dress Codes: After Years of Being Out, the Necktie Is In
Generation Q
Why Democracy?

What caught your news-eye recently?  Please comment and share an article (with link) that you thought was an important read.

Missed the news?  Follow these leads and hopefully you’ll be back on track.  This is an array of news that caught my eye.

Debating the epidemic of painkiller abuse.

Skip work and make love for your country.

Rethinking the age of sexual consent.

Hounding the Bloggers

The Limits Of Non-Violence In Burma

What Makes a Monk Mad

Radiohead Album Price Tag: ‘It’s Up to You’

Face of the Day

Losing A Generation?

The number of young people who do not consider themselves Christians is growing, as is the hostility toward Christianity expressed by the next generation of non-Christians, claims a new book from David Kinnaman of Barna.org.

The Daily Dish

I think we all have within us particularly strong religious sentiments these days.  The voice in America is a resoundingly religious one.  I know we can’t do much about our founding fathers but, bless their soul, they impacted our nations life-course and therefore ours too. 

You either are or you aren’t.  I’m not even necessarily talking religious or not but more specifically Christian or not.  Even our democratic presidential candidates are fighting over their carefully planned nuances of religious practice.

And yes, I FEEL disdain.

I am Catholic.  It feels odd saying it though.  I was Catholic, then not.  Next I was atheist, then agnostic, then spiritual, Taoist, and now back to Catholic.  Yet, it still feels as confusing as ever.  The main reason why I rejected Catholicism was because of the seemingly strong rejection of homosexuals, at least on the surface.

Did you know that I even find myself really agreeing with The Secret? Have you seen the movie or read the book?

This many times is the innate struggle of our generation.  To broaden, I really feel like this rejection, reception, and reconciliation cycle applies to anyone who is in the process of becoming something.  As a cultural root, unless you have arrived, we are stuck rejecting, embracing, or something-ing our religious feelings.

Can you see the tentacles stemming from everything, especially in our decided search or non-search for spirituality?  I think it’s time to stop sprawling.  Reaching out for the answers might not be what actually makes the most sense.  Look inward, aren’t ALL of these feelings coming from the same place?  Truth isn’t going to feel awkward or uncomfortable but should feel as simple and easy as possible.  The answers are what won’t come easy.  So we need to decouple ourselves from whatever camp we find ourselves in, religious or not.  You will find there might be whole chunks of information to grab instead of picking up years of broken, scattered, over-discussed and analyzed information.

I share in our struggle to find restraint, especially in a world pressuring us to sprawl for answers.